Beerfootball

Setup

Two six sided dice
Four people (two per team)
A table
masking tape

Rules to drink by

Beer Football

Quick rules
The game is played by two teams of two people. A rectangular table is used with “endzones” marked with tape (the endzones I use are about the length of a DVD case.) The object of the game is to roll your dice into the opposing team’s endzone. Each player rolls one die per turn. A dice that lands in the opponents endzone scores as many points as are showing on the dice and the opponents must drink that may sips/seconds or beer. You play to 52 points with teams switching sides at halftime.

Full Rules

Equipment

a. Two six sided dice (I like 16mm poly dice, but that’s just me)
b. A table, preferably rectangular
c. Four people

Grounds Keeping

a. The table must be roughly rectangular. Further, the table must be at least 52in long and 24in wide.
b. Two chairs are placed at each end of the table.
c. The “endzone” is the length of a VHS tape or DVD case (approx. 7 1/8in). It is marked from the edge of the table to front of the marking tape or line.
d. The midline, if not apparent, should be marked.

Teams
a. Each team consists of two people.
b. Teams sit at opposite ends of the table.
c. Prior to the beginning of the game, each team must come up with a name. The name should preferably be vulgar or strange. (some of my favorites include Dick, Tac, Toe…Cunt Funkenstein…Eddie Munster, Cum Dumpster…and Jizzly Adams)

The Coin Toss
a. To determine which team goes first, each team rolls a die. The team rolling highest goes first.
b. Ties are re-rolled by the other members of the team.
c. Any die rolled off the table is considered a zero.

The Game
a. The object of the game is to score at least 52 points before the opposing team does.
b. A team scores by throwing their dice into the opposing team’s endzone. The number showing on the die is the number of points scored. (The particulars of scoring will be discussed under “Scoring”)
c. After the first of the two teams scores 26 or more points, it is halftime. During halftime, teams switch sides and, during non-tournament play, may smoke or go to the bathroom. Partaking in illicit drugs during halftime is to be considered “The half-time show.”
d. The game ends once one of the teams has scored 52 points.

The Roll
a. Each player rolls one dice per turn
b. The players hand may not cross the goal line when the die is in the player’s hand. However, the follow through of a roll may cross the goal line after the die has been released. (Some people are rather liberal with this rule. These people are called pussies. Others are very strict, these people are called Nick Urich)
c. The die must turn at least one die face on a roll (no sliding).
d. Each player must remain seated while throwing.
e. The dice remains in play until after both players have thrown.

Scoring
a. A player scores by having his die sitting in the opponents endzone at the end of the teams throw.
b. The endzone extends from the end of the table to the front of the goal line.
c. A die that comes to rest in the endzone, but that is subsequently knocked out of the endzone by another die (or any foreign object on the table knocked over by a die), does not score.
d. A die that comes to rest in the field of play and then is knocked into the endzone is considered a scoring dice.
e. The number showing on the upward facing side of a scoring die is the number of points a team scores.
f. A die must only be breaking the plane of the goal line at the end of a turn, not touching the goal line, to be a score.
g. The game ends when a team scores 52 or more points.

Drinking
a. A player must drink if, during his roll, the die rolls off the table and one of his opponents catches it. If one of his opponents does not catch it, then they must drink. If the die goes off the side of the table, the thrower must take one drink.
b. A player must drink each time his opponents score. A number of sips, swallows, seconds, etc. (as determined by all players) is consumed in accordance with the number of points scored.
c. If a player fails to throw the die across the midline, he must drink the amount shown on the die. If rolled off the table prior to the midline, the rolling player must drink six.
d. Any time a team scores double (two 5’s, two 3’s, etc.) the opposing team must drink twice the total of both dice.
e. Anytime a beer is struck while occupying a “defensive role”, it must be slammed IMMEDIATELY. A player may shotgun or bong said beer if a beer bong is available. Doing a shot of hard alcohol is also acceptable.
f. A “defensive role” is defined as any beer placement, during the opponents roll, other than the corner of the endzone. During tournament play, a defensive roll is described as anywhere in the room. However, the die must strike the table prior to striking the beer to necessitate slamming the beer.
g. If a team does not score 26 points or more, prior to the end of the game, said team must finish their beers.
h. A player must drink any time they commit a penalty

Common Penalties
a. Picking up an opponents die prior to the end of their turn.
Penalty: place die where it was and take one drink
b. Moving your beer during your opponents turn if your beer is on the table.
Penalty: The person rolling the die may take the result of the roll or reroll. If the beer is struck by the die, it must be slammed immediately and the person rolling may reroll or take the result of the roll. If it is judged that the beer would have been struck by the die prior to its moving, it must be slammed immediately and the roller may take the result of the roll or reroll.
c. Dropping the die or not catching an opponent’s roll that goes off the table.
Penalty: Take one drink

Misc.
a. No one may leave the field of play for any reason other than to get another beer/drink
b. At halftime, you must cheers your opponents and take a drink
c. The winning team retains control of the table and may (some would say must) play the next game.
d. Each team must have a vulgar and/or strange name (be creative)
e. If grounds exist for a rematch (exceptionally close game, grudge, breaking of an exceptional streak, etc.) a two out of three series may be demanded if circumstances permit.

By: Alex …. Player of beer football since 1998… If you want a word file of these rules or a nice stat tracking excel sheet, email me at purebliss22@yahoo.com

Appendix A. Score keeping for later official documentation

1. Arrange your scorecard as depicted below:

Team Name #1 Turns Team Name #2

Teammate #1 Teammate #2 Teammate #1 Teammate #2

2. After the coin toss, draw an arrow in the direction of the team that will go first above “Turns”
3. Every time this team goes, put a mark in the turns box
4. Every time a team scores, mark the points in the box under the team name. In addition, mark the number (the numeral such as “5”…not just lines) in the box underneath the scoring players name.
5. If the score is a snipe, (defined as a player knocking his partners dice or both the teams dice into the scoring area) draw a circle around the number.
6. If a player scores the points necessary to put his team above 52 and thereby wins the game, put a “K” in the scoring players box (this “K” stands for kill)
7. If a player is made to slam a beer, put a “-1” at the bottom of his box. This stands for one beer slammed. The player forcing the slamming of the beer has a “+1” put at the bottom of his box, this stands for one slam forced. Do this each time a beer is slammed.
8. Write any notes underneath the scores. Things such as an unusual finish (such as the opposing team winning the game by bouncing a die off someone’s bare ass) or a long streak of consecutive scores should be noted.
9. If you’re too drunk to keep accurate score…just stick to the basic score…or find some poor bastard to do it for you…this is supposed to be fun…not an exercise in book keeping.
10. Enter all of this crap into the excel spreadsheet template provided (remember to copy and paste the template into multiple worksheets to handle the stats for all players)

Submitted by

Bliss from University of Minnesota